I LOVE YOU. These three little words can make the strong come undone. Did you ever take a moment to explore your ability or inability to love? What draws you to the person you love romantically? What keeps you loving who you love? What keeps you from loving? How did we learn to love? Do we instinctively love romantically or does that ability come from the examples our parents set before us? Does anyone really know how to love or do we just wing it and hope it works out well?
We were taught pretty much everything by our parents. They were our first teachers. They taught us how to and what to eat, sleep patterns, how to write, read, proper behavior, and so much more. I cannot remember being taught how to love romantically. My parents were separated I did not witness the romantic love at home growing up. Loved flowed in my household nonetheless. My parents loved me and I knew it. I believe there is a direct correlation between the love that you received and experienced at home growing up and the love that you give as an adult. Based on how your parents loved you and showed love to each other is how you will love others in your relationships. Are we taught to love? Is there a lesson in love? I think not. We just interpreted what we saw taking in the positive and the negative with no real instruction or explanation.
Over time I have given great thought to this topic. When I talk to people I hear many different stories of love. I’ve heard the good, the bad, and the ugly. Listening to the varies stories I truly believe we were not taught how to love. Those that appear to get it right display the by-product of getting it right; a committed relationship and yet they still struggle with love and knowing how to love on many levels. Some of these people are simply survivors with the willpower to stay the course or are terrified to be alone. Only a small percentage are truly in love and truly love their partner. Hence the high divorce rate.
With the high percentage of divorce, I can’t help but wonder if love should have been taught in our public and private education systems and continued through college. Is it too late to add LOVE to the course study in our educational system? So many are searching for love and have no idea how to give, receive or just simply love. Many have missed the love lesson. The first lesson, LOVE 101: Love is a verb which requires action.